So I thought I knew what I really wanted with my clown. I thought I was going to go through my personal clown door. I begged and pleaded with that door. Threw fits in front of it. I tried to force it open. I tried to blow it open (3 Little Pigs style). After I thought about it maybe that is not even my clown door I thought or others convinced me it was. And what really awaits on the other side? Is it a zonk door? Or is it even a door? It could be a painted door on a wall like in the cartoons. For now since I don’t know where my clown door is or what it even looks like now. I am taking a hiatus from clowning for now.
There is really no other way around this. I mean I thought about this really hard. Is what they want from you anyone who strays is punished. So when I come back I hope to be the best clown’s clown ever! To adhere to the most rigid and strict rules and codes of clowning. To be an indistinguishable individual clown.
It’s been so easy and dumbed down that anybody with a few basic skills can do it. Get yourself a nice costume learn, a few skills learn, a few jokes, and get an education and you are a clown. The most important thing I need to achieve this lofty goal is money. And if my calculations are correct. I would probably need about $5000. To get started. Since I do not have that kind of money at hand or anything close to it I’m going on an indefinite hiatus from trying to become a clown. Only when I reach that pinnacle of clowning will I become a real clown.
Plus I feel a little cheated a lot of them said it would be easy. All I needed to do was ABC and buy XYZ. And that was it I would become a clown almost immediately. I’ve been so worried about doing it right and not getting it wrong. When there is external pressure or perceived external pressure.
You clowns let me into your very strange and secretive world. I’m very thankful for that. I felt like George Costanza when he goes to that exclusive club that turned into a meat packing plant when him and Jerry visited it.
Like many beginners I felt I didn’t fit in because I didn’t have the right stuff. I have been an admirer of clowns for about ⅚ of my life. As a child I had lofty dreams of running away with the circus. And back then for some reason I thought being a clown as some type of glamorous occupation.
But I have a word of advice for a lot of clowns or well if you are a specific type of clown and that is to make newcomers aware of all the clown rules that exist. To tell somebody who is thinking about becoming a clown or somebody just starting out. Those rules are there and important and must be followed to the letter.
I decided to take an indefinite hiatus until I have the time and money to be a clown.